- 5 min read

Case Study - Website Copywriting for Financial Services

Using copy to bring focus and personality to a functional financial services website

A laptop is open, with a website visible on the screen. The website is for Downton Mortgages and Financial Services (the subject of this case study). The business owners are smiling at camera and the headline for their homepage is "Mortgage Broker and Financial Adviser in Hertfordshire"

Clara has been running a successful mortgage advice business for 5 years Her business has grown due to excellent customer service and word-of-mouth recommendations, but with renewed growth plans, she felt it was time to unlock the marketing potential of her website too.

Screengrab of Clara's old home page. The headline reads "Mortgage for You" and there is a lot of small text under the headline. There is a panel for services and then a long section of Google testimonials. The page is cluttered and hard to read.

Their old website (image shown here) was originally created to allow them to advertise on social media (financial regulations stipulate that mortgage brokers need a website in order to advertise on social media). It hadn’t been designed as a tool for generating business.

When we first chatted we looked at her analytics which showed that her site needed to do 3 things better:

bring more visitors to the site

improve their experience on the site

get more inquiries from visitors.

I’ve focused this case study around each of those goals, so feel free to click on the links above to skip to whichever section you’re interested in.

Clara and Shannon were a joy to work with because they trusted the process. They were open-minded and saw the potential that copywriting had to achieve their business objectives.

You can visit Clara's website here

Clara and Shannon didn’t want a full redesign, but they did want an audit of their copy which identified the following gaps:

· It wasn’t optimised for SEO.

· It didn’t focus on how their services benefited the reader.

· It was tricky to read – lots of text, jargon and complicated sentences.

· Navigation was difficult due to a complicated menu of options.

· The copy didn’t match Clara or Shannon’s personality.

· It wasn’t clear to the reader what their next steps should be.

Following this audit, Clara and Shannon decided to go ahead and hired me to rewrite their entire website.

"Our original website was basic, outdated, not easy to read or navigate and didn’t provide a good digital first impression for clients .... What you have created has solved all of these problems"

So here's what we did........

Objective 1: Get more visitors to the site

Writing with SEO in mind

There are two potential customers for Clara's business. Those who are in the market for a mortgage broker and those who need a mortgage but haven’t yet considered a broker. It was important Clara's website could be found by both of these customers when searching for information.

Focusing on more specific keyword phrases - The mortgage and insurance market is huge and also competitive. This meant that trying to rank for key words such as "Mortgages" or "Mortgage Broker" simply wasn't realistic. We focused instead on longer key phrases such as “Mortgage broker in Hertfordshire”. These had a relatively low number of searches but still enough to make a difference to Clara’s business.

Having a separate page for each service

Clara’s site listed all 7 of her mortgage services on one page. Not only was this confusing for the reader (more on this later) but it was also making it harder for Google to index information accurately.

We separated out each mortgage and insurance service onto separate pages, with their own URL, SEO title, H1 and relevant body copy. There was also a summary page for those who wanted to view all the services easily before continuing:

A screengrab from the new website showing a services summary page. This page is for Insurance and shows 4 separate clickable boxes. The services summarised are Life insurance, critical illness cover, income protection and family income benefit.

Using FAQs to cover the information readers need most

FAQs are a great way to tell Google your website has useful content. It’s also helpful for the reader and it provides a solid basis for your content planning; there’s the potential to write a specific blog for each question which will further boost SEO rankings.

For tips on how to craft a brilliant blog check out this post.

"We’ve seen an increase in clients who have come to us because they found us online. Thank you for all the time and creative energy you put into it"

Objective 2: Improve user experience

By rewriting all Clara's copy specifically with the reader in mind, the layout of the page became clear.

Each service page of the website now has:

· A descriptive title and image

· Succinct information about who might need that service

· A clear overview of how Downton Mortgages & Financial Services can help

· Testimonials

· Frequently asked questions

· A contact form

We worked with Amy Gumbrell from Two Cows Web to help add the new structure to the site. She was a joy to work with and I’m so happy with how she brought my proposed layout to life.

A before and after screen grab of Clara's site. On the left shows a site with lots of text in one block. The image on the right shows a more structured page with clear headings and smaller paragraphs

Bringing Clara's personality into the site

User experience isn't just about the information and the structure of the site, it's also about the tone and style of the writing.

Clara has a very personable style of working with her clients and can simplify complicated concepts which put her clients at ease. Nothing is ever too much trouble.

None of this was coming across in her copy because it was too formal which is common in financial services website copy. Instead, we adopted a more conversational style that was still professional and informative, but a little more approachable.

I also convinced them to get a few professional photos done to accompany the new copy which means their approachable brand is clear from the home page even before the copy is read.

"I loved how you brought a personal element to the website and captured our personalities and who we are. You put a face behind the business"

A screengrab showing an example of how we included personality in the copy. The copy reads "At Downton Mortgages & Financial Services, we understand this might be the biggest financial commitment you have ever made and that everything is new. This is where working with a mortgage broker is so helpful – we’ll take the time to listen to your questions (yes, all of them!), understand your concerns, and guide you through all your options."

Objective 3: Convert more visitors

Making the most of some brilliant testimonials

Clara has some incredible testimonials – not just 5-star ratings, but seriously happy customers. A service like mortgage and insurance advice needs to build trust so I wanted these fantastic testimonials on every page. This meant that no matter where a reader entered the website, they got the same feeling of reassurance.

Telling the reader what to do

I made sure that every page had at least two conversion points. This was usually a contact form placed at the bottom of each page, along with a button under key paragraphs. This took the reader straight to the contact page. Not every visitor will scroll to the bottom of the page, so Call To Action buttons like this help to convert as many people as possible irrespective of where they are on the site.

Screen shot of the new website showing how benefits have been outlined. The copy reads "working for yourself shouldn't be a barrier to buying the house of your dreams. Our team can take the time and stress out of securing the right mortgage"

Focusing on benefits

Clara's original site didn't spell out the benefits of using a mortgage broker: time saving, cost saving and decision-making confidence. Weaving these into every page of copy ensures that the reader is left in no doubt that their life will be made easier .

Screen grab of the new site showing how barriers have been addressed. The headline copy reads "we work at a fast pace but you'll never feel rushed"

Addressing barriers

I used the About Us page to help address some of the barriers to using a mortgage broker.

In this industry, the barriers are often cost and trust. Once a visitor is reading about the team behind a company, they are already pretty invested and open to this information.

"We got what you said you would deliver – a website that’s fresh, current, looks amazing and is user friendly. I’m proud to have clients visit the website as it’s a great reflection of our business and who we are"

If you'd like to see more, you can visit Clara's website here

Could new copy help your business website?

If you have a website that is no longer fit for purpose and needs to drive more growth for your business, then addressing your copy should be your first step before investing in design. Take a look at my website copywriting services and get in touch to find out more.